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My Review of Black Swan

When the lights came up at the conclusion of the film, I hid my runny nose in a white tissue under the guise of a common cold so that no one would suspect me of being too emotional and I could not get home fast enough to write a review, which I seldom do.

From the beginning, a man's head was in my direct line of vision and two chatty old ladies behind me were telling one another irritating versions of how they arrived to the Pavillion through the remnants of a mammoth urban snowfall. The guy next to me subtly offered his share of the armrest which I politely declined, but appreciated his acknowledgement of this sliver of personal space in an otherwise crowded room.

Black Swan tormented me nearly as much as its torn cuticles tormented the guy next to me. The only scene that horrified him more was when Mila Kunis ripped off Natalie Portman's underwear, which I did not mind. The two beautiful A-listers were like chocolate covered pretzels, savory and sweet, and still I was uneasy …